Goodreads Book GiveawayRedeeming Senpaiby S.N. McKibbenGiveaway ends May 25, 2022. See the giveaway details at Goodreads. What more need be said?
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Word Count 81K
This story has made me go into my past and think about things that had happened to me, face them, in a realistic way, and deal with the skeletons of my history. I feel wiser for and stronger for the predicaments I've placed myself in and grateful. Grateful to come out stronger.
Cryptic, I know. If you care to get the story, email me. I'm not brave enough to spew past happenings out in the open. This story is as close as it will get.
Handle with Care
This is a totally unedited chapter. It may or may not stay the same after final edits and it may or may not remain in the story.
If you find any grammar, spelling or punctuation errors, please let know via the comments!! I may not get to them right away, but I will get to them. Thank you!
If you are totally lost & would like to start at the beginning of (working title) HANDLE WITH CARE, click the button below.
Happy reading!
Chapter 16
Rippling sheets shielded the dingy stage. The permanent auditorium chairs hid behind elegant drapes. Even the old tile floors were as clean as they’d ever get—for being walked on since the age of plankton. The age also known as Principal Ellis’ high school years, who admired every piece and looked at each name-place-card under the photos. He seemed impressed with each of his students.
But no one seemed more proud than Mr. Caplin. He pointed out details of the submitted art only a photographer would know to anyone that listened. At the moment, that listener was Principal Ellis.
Of everyone here I was one of two people wearing a suit. Kai insisted. I supposed he bought me this three-piece so I could impress college interviewers, but I felt stupid and overdressed. Especially since the only other person wearing formal wear was the principal. The person I wanted here was on his way.
“Oh, my, god. You dressed for a celebration, didn’t you?” Aubrey swankered up to me.
“Ah, no.” I grimaced and narrowed my eyes at her. “I promised to wear this,” I mumbled.
“It’d be a shame to waste this look.” She waved me up and down. “I mean, wow.”
Aubrey was standing in front of me in a cute floral yellow dress, giving me an in to ask her out, but all I saw was the ghost of her brother behind her cracking his knuckles then taking a baseball bat to my soft ball head.
“Thank you.” My cheeks prickled.
“Come with me after. We’ll celebrate.” Aubrey looped her arm around mine. “We can go to this place I know.”
“Ahhh… would your brother drive us there?”
“No way.” She laughed. “It’s called Uber.”
“You have to be eighteen to ride.” Though I’d used Uber in desperate times. Being one of Andy’s favorites meant having a fake I.D. I still had the card to get me into places.
“Not if you know the right people.” She fluttered her eyelashes.
“And I look like the right people?”
“In that suit you do.”
“Am I being used for my good looks?”
Aubrey smiled. She really was good at getting what she wanted. “You just look like the kind of guy that would know how to work around the system.”
I rolled my eyes. It was hard to say no to Aubrey.
“Come-on, it’ll be fun.” She wiggled on my arm.
“What’s your angle?”
Aubrey gave me a wicked smile. “What if my only motive was to show you a good time.”
That in itself scared me. She was always on the move. Doing something, researching something, getting into trouble. I lifted my eyes to the ceiling. “You need money?”
Aubrey’s light-hearted side faded and she shook her head.
This side of her, the serious side, I trusted. “If you need help Aubrey, I’ll give it.”
She bit her lower lip and looked up at me with huge puppy-dog eyes. “Text me when you’re done.”
“Okay.” I nodded, and she let go of my arm and entered the hall of photos.
My cell phone went off in my pocket.
Here. Kai texted.
My stomach lurched. At the main entryway. In suit and tie, stood Kai scanning the room. I waved and jogged up to him.
“Impressive.” Though his voice flat and unimpressed, I knew he was just being Kai, The Wall.
“Mr. Caplin did all the decorations.” I waved to the long hanging sheets.
“Yes, that too is very professional.”
I turned to Kai and was met by his golden stare. Oh. He meant I was impressive. Kai-ese was a nuance language and I was still a grass-hopper.
Overwhelming gratefulness, gratitude, love… things I couldn’t name swelled inside me. I was a bottle being filled with the most amazing soda. Something better than Red Bull. I was hot, cold, clammy, sticky and bursting with energy.
“Come here, I have something to show you.” I waved him to follow me.
He stiffened, eyeing me with suspicion but followed.
I walked towards the hallway of photos but went a little past the entrance. In a smooth, practiced lunge, I snatched his shirt sleeve and pulled him through the curtains and behind the scenes. We collided into a full body hug before crashing into the permanent chairs.
Three months ago, I’d never been able to maneuver someone with a wrist-hold. But I used my tactical dojo training in practical uses. Like getting Kai behind the scenes.
He remained silent, as I knew he would, completing my ninja move to a private world where no one saw us and I could squeeze this happiness into him. We were, technically, in public, but the curtains shielded us from view. It got me hot thinking people were right there. We could hear them yet they didn’t know we were within two feet.
“Thank you. For coming.” I was about to let go when Kai wrapped his arms around me.
He buried his face in my neck as one hand pushed at the back of my head, crushing my nose to his shoulder. His other arm was a band around my waist and brought me closer.
Shit.
This was irresponsible of me. I should have thought of how this would affect him. Just because he seemed to have a leash on himself, didn’t mean it was easy.
He held me, careful not to bring his hips too close. His tight unrelenting grip, his breath heavy and tickling the hairs on my neck. Kai breathed me in through his nose and stuttered out his mouth. His scent mixed with the smell of suit fabric soothed this ache. The clawing animal inside stopped as if reveling in Kai’s embrace. Home. Safe.
“The things I would do…” Kai’s voice was so low his whisper a scarce breath.
Oh crap. This was dangerous. I’d underestimated Kai’s limit of control. I tried to push him away, but his hold was titanium.
“Mr. Akiyama.”
Kai stiffened and let me go.
Principal Ellis stood two seat rows down. His face just as much a wall as Kai’s.
“Principal Ellis.” Kai bowed his head.
“Mr. Kroll.” The principal drew out my name. His jaw tight. Eyes piercing. Principal Ellis reminded me of a beady-eyed falcon with German Shepard traits. He knew when to be where. It was a little freaky, how he swooped in at the right time. His insight appeared super natural.
Worse, Kai and Principal Ellis shared the same type of silent communication. If two walls spoke to each other, this is what it would look like.
“Mr. Kroll,” Principal Ellis said, this time without elongating my name like I’d been caught hugging my boyfriend. “Mr. Akiyama has business with me. In private.”
“Oh, okay.”
Kai grabbed the back seat of a permanent chair and squeezed the wood so hard it moaned under his hand.
Principal Ellis focused his pin-point stare at Kai.
Woah. There was some under lying issues between the two.
“Liam, please wait for me at the entrance.” Kai spoke to me but didn’t look away from The Principal.
“I’ll be waiting.” I slunk out from the fabric shield and into the hall of photos. Through the sheets I heard Kai speak in a low tone.
“Your rudeness is uncalled for.”
“I saw what he did and considering your past…” Principal Ellis’ reply trailed off.
That’s right. Principal Ellis proudly showed me class trophies. He knew Kai and apparently had some sort of history. I wanted to find out more but neither one spoke.
They probably knew I was listening in.
Guess that’s all I would hear.
Interested in more?
Want to catch up with the series? Start with Seducing Sensei, available now at your favorite retailer! |
Word Count 76K
*This is what the word count is for the book so far. This will be close to a 90K word story.
Regarding the sketch, I chose a moment from chapter 4 which I though was really funny and representative of their current situation:
"But it would be so much more fun if you wrestled me to the ground." I covered my mouth with a hand. That was not what I was going to say. My checks burned.
Kai picked up his fork and went back to eating as if my sexual innuendo didn’t mean anything. I promptly went back to my food and shut up.
In this scene I was trying to show Kai's point of view on sex, his rigid principles and how he feels about Liam. His boyfriend isn't legal yet, even though Kai agreed to "go out" with Liam they both want monogamy but the relationship is sexless.
This pushes Kai, a healthy, young male into certain carnal explosive positions in which he tries to avoid.
Liam has only ever had bad, forceful sex and most of it was when he was "leased out" as a male prostitute. He has urges but they aren't as strong because of his past. This eventually comes to light. For right now, during this scene, Liam─the eighteen year old─is the voice of reason and stronger of the two when it comes to putting the brakes on before the two have intercourse.
In other words Kai wants him bad, but Liam's like─meh. That changes when Liam discovers the joy of great sex. Of course that doesn't happen until he's of legal age.
Hope you enjoy!
Handle with Care
No part of this story may be reproduced or transmitted without written prior permission from the publisher. This is a work of fiction. All characters, names, events, incidents and places are of the author’s imagination and not to be confused with fact. Any resemblance to living persons or events is merely coincidence.
This is a totally unedited chapter. It may or may not stay the same after final edits and it may or may not remain in the story.
If you find any grammar, spelling or punctuation errors, please let know via the comments!! I may not get to them right away, but I will get to them. Thank you!
If you are totally lost & would like to start at the beginning of (working title) HANDLE WITH CARE, click the button below.
Happy reading!
Chapter 15
“How are you dealing with that?” Jennifer sat behind her desk, glasses on, hair framing her down-turned face as she scribbled in her notebook.
I cleared my throat. “I am dealing with it fine.”
She stopped writing and looked up at me. “Specifically, what are you doing to deal with your attraction.”
It was no use telling her there was no attraction between Liam and I. Jennifer could see through me. “I go to the dojo every night. I take extra cases. Keeping busy helps.”
Jennifer folded her hands and cast me an expectant stare.
On any other day I could wait her out, but lately my calm grated against the inner demon. My patience grew shorter and often. I was becoming sarcastic, haughty, and my temper was easily raised. Every ounce of control was put to the test. Especially when I was around Liam. “It takes everything I have to steer my thoughts clear of any sexual fantasies.”
“When was the last time you had intercourse?”
Some might think her questions intrusive, irrelevant, but I found her direct speech refreshing. She did not mince her words. “Eleven months.”
“And you’ve had no thoughts about Liam?”
“No. None. Not at all.” Liar. I would catch a slip of his skin and desire to touch him. He would talk with his hands and I would imagine how those fingers felt on my torso. The show of ankle and then my mind would wander into a scene where he locked his legs around my hips. But I snapped out of all of them before my imagination ran away too far.
“Kai…” Jennifer sighed. “Liam isn’t six years old. He’s three months from being legal.”
“He is three months, fifteen days, and nine hours from being legal.”
She compressed her lips. “It would be normal to fantasize about the person you like.”
“I will not go down that road.”
“You said yourself he’s an adult…”
“He thinks like an adult. He is still a minor.”
“Are you doing this to prevent another Mori situation?”
I flashed her a scowl.
She did not flinch. “It’s a valid question.”
“What do you think?” I hissed. Then amended, “Of course.”
“Do you think denying yourself will change the way you deal with Liam when you two finally have sex.”
I sucked in a breath. “Can we not talk about this?” Sex and Liam in the same thought was dangerous. Illegal even, despite what Jennifer said.
“How’s work?”
“Fine.”
“Not having any issues with your co-workers?”
“Mr. Puzo thinks I have abused my power.”
She nodded. “He came the other day asking for information about you. I gave him the client privileges act and told him there was nothing he could use from me that would involve your work performance.”
“Thank you.”
Jennifer knew about my past, about me helping Mori put a father in jail so we could get said father’s family to safety. Not everyone got out of harm’s way. Mr. Puzo must have found out about my under-the-radar string pulling.
“Liam invited me to an art competition.” No matter how I tried the conversation always went back to my boyfriend.
Boyfriend.
A title that kept me from losing my mind. At the very least, he was mine.
“Sounds like a date.”
I kept my head down but flicked my eyes over to see her reaction. “Is that, okay? We are not having sex.”
“Yes, Kai. Yes. That’s a good thing.”
Relief flooded my body. “We made an agreement.”
She remained silent. Jennifer never pushed.
“We want monogamy… we go on dates, but there is no sex. No kissing. No touching. But I am his boyfriend, I mean we are going out, a couple. But there…”
“Is no sex. I get it, Kai. I think that’s wonderful.”
“Talking to him is a relief and added pressure.” I smoothed the wrinkles in my slacks and kept my eyes down. “He is an amazing person. He is taking the age of consent seriously. He keeps the physical part out of our relationship. That is why I say he thinks like an adult.” Liam was not lost in his dick. He thought about the consequences. Not just for himself but for me.
“Buuuuut…” Jennifer prompted.
“My own urges are getting harder to resist.”
“You know, Kai, touching someone doesn’t automatically mean sex is on their mind. You can hold hands, or heaven forbid, hug without it meaning anything other than affection. Affection does not mean sex.”
Touching Liam. I shivered. Remembering Saturday’s hug sent a spike of energy up and down my spine. My cock started getting in on the action, an indication I should direct my imagination somewhere else. Like how my father would react to Liam being my boyfriend.
“He massaged my shoulders.”
“Well, there, you see.”
I did not have the heart to tell her I stepped out of his hold before I turned around, stripped naked and had him in my hallway. “We will make due. Four months will pass by quickly.” If I kept saying that, maybe I would believe it.
“True, but I’m a little worried about you.”
“How so?”
“Given that you and your boyfriend are monogamous and not having sex, are you masturbating?”
“What? No!” My body moved on its own. I stood and paced the length of her couch. There was no way I could disguise my abject horror. Did she think me one of those creeps that think about children when having sex?
Jennifer remained stoic. “As I was saying, there is a very large difference between a six-year-old body and a seventeen-year-old body. Don’t get me wrong. The age of consent is eighteen, but considering your past…”
“I am in control.” I sat down, loosening the tension in my jaw. I reined in my temper and straightened my tie. “I am in control. This situation is different.”
“How?”
“There is no touching, no teasing. It’s a shorter wait.”
“Have you talked to him about what will happen when he turns eighteen and you can have sex?”
“Are you asking if he is a virgin?”
“That was not my question.”
“We will talk about that when he is eighteen.” But it occurred to me that Jennifer might have already seen Liam as a patient. Her questions were always pointed. Direct. She was trying to lead me to a series of thoughts.
Jennifer compressed her lips again and waited me out. For what, I wasn’t sure.
“Can we get off the subject of Liam?” Bringing up his name was the very act of talking about him.
Jennifer kept her head down, writing. “We can talk about anything you want.”
But, for all I was worth, I could not think of anything to talk about. The time passed in silence. It was a testament to how Liam touched every aspect of my life. Work reminded me of him. Home reminded me of him. When I went to the dojo I conjured what lesson to teach him. I breathed Liam. Ate Liam. My heart beat drummed syllables to his name. Li-am. Li-am. Li-am. Li-am.
Finally I sighed and hung my head in resignation.
“Kai?”
I raised my head to Jennifer’s soft call.
“How are you sleeping?”
“Not much.” The admittance was painful, but I was no coward to truth. “I try but my erection keeps me awake.”
Silence.
Jennifer’s mouth thinned. Her hands folded. My therapist’s eyes cast down to her desk.
“Say what you want to say.”
“You requested not to.”
“Out with it.”
“What you are doing is unhealthy.”
“My thoughts are what is unhealthy.” I know what she wanted me to do. But masturbation was not an option. “If I release myself I will think of him. Thinking of him while he is still a minor… doing that is sick.”
“Again, he’s not six-years-old.”
“That does not give me license to think of him in that way.”
“And because you are in a relationship, you’re not seeking out companionship to relieve the stress, I take it.”
“That suggestion is just as disgusting.” I would not cheat on Liam. Nor would I ask his permission to have sex with another person. It would not only put him in an awkward choice, it was not an action I wanted to entertain. We agreed. Monogamy. I refused to fail him another time. Liam would have the best of me.
“Couples do what they need to. When it’s not about the sex and they are trying to stay together, sometimes unconventional relationships help keep them together.”
“That is not applicable in this situation.” I was not opposed to unconventional. Hell, in the past, if I shared Mori with his other lovers I would have been all right with that. At least for a while.
“So, we have an impasse.”
“Yes, doctor, we do.”
Jennifer sighed in a I give-up kind of way. “If I prescribe you a sleep formula, will you take it?”
“No pills.”
“It’s not medication, it’s natural. Over the counter items.”
I was still leery. “I will research it.”
She scribbled on a pad and handed me a sheet with a website URL.
“Thank you.” With that, I was done with the session. I stood and walked out of the office ten minutes before my time.
Interested in more?
Want to catch up with the series?Start with Seducing Sensei, available now at your favorite retailer! |
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